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MARRIAGE & FAMILY
RELATIONS
I.
Husband &
Wife
A.
Genesis 1:26-28,31
Note: Our mates are not
“God” to us…expecting them to meet all our needs for only God can
meet all our needs according to His riches in Christ Jesus.(Philippians
4:19) Nor or we to play god in our mates lives.
B.
“God said, Let
us make man in our own image, after our likeness.”
1.
Father…Son…Spirit/
Soul…Body…Spirit
2.
Acceptance: God
allowed us to be made as we are so thank Him!
C.
“Male and female
created He them.”
1.
In Common: Everyone
needs 1,)to be loved, 2.)to be needed and 3.)to be accepted.
2.
Differences:
Physical, Psychological, Needs and Interests.
3.
God created the male…
1.)
Support 3.) Leadership
2.)
Trust 4.)
Encouraged to follow the Lord
4.
God created the female…
1.)
Security 3.)
Intimacy of words and touch
2.)
Reassurance 4.)
Encouraged to follow the Lord
5.
“God blessed
them …be fruitful and multiply”
a.
God commanded the
man and woman to have sex!
b.
Male-sight and smell
and Female-sound and touch
D.
“God saw everything
that He had made, and behold it was very good.”
1.
God said that sex is
VERY good!
II.
Genesis 2:18,21-25
A.
“God said, It is not
good for man to be alone.”
1.
The man and woman
need fellowship
B.
“I will make a
help meet for him.”
(i)
Compliment not
compete
(ii)
“meet” is Hebrew
“fit”
C.
“God took
the rib of man and made woman.”
1.
Nearest man’s
heart
2.
“woman” is
Hebrew “taken out of man”
D.
“Adam: Bone of
my bone and flesh of my flesh.”
1.
God gave Eve to Adam
as a gift from Him!
2.
Man’s need met:
physical body, image in sex, sight, smell
3.
Woman’s need met:
hearing, words, conversation, touch
NOTE: Culture dictates
marriage arrangements of decisions being made 1.)by parents, 2.)elders or
3.)couple with Godly counsel. Getting acquainted: spiritually,
intellectually, Emotionally, Sexually
E.
“Therefore shall a
man leave his father and his mother.”
1.
Importance of
leaving
2.
Father and Mother
are role models for good or bad
3.
Honor, respect,
Godly counsel
4.
Priorities:
God, Husband/Wife, Children, Family, Body of Christ, Vocation, Recreation
F.
“And shall cleave
unto his wife.”
1.
Cleave is Hebrew
“adhere”
2.
Deuteronomy 24:5
“When a man taketh a new wife, he shall not got out to war, neither
shall he be charged with any business: but he shall be free at home one
year, and shall cheer up his wife which he hath taken.”
G.
“And they shall be
one flesh, naked and not ashamed!”
1.
Love is a choice,
act of one’s will
2.
Love is words and
action not just passion
3.
Love is commitment
and emotions
III.
Matthew 19:6
A.
“Wherefore they
are no more two but one flesh.”
1.
Two become one
2.
“What therefore God
hath joined together let no man put asunder.”
B.
Divorce:
Matthew 5:s7-28; Matthew 15:19; Galatians 5:19
IV.
Malachi 2:16 “For the Lord God of Israel saith that He
hateth putting
away”(God hates divorce!)
V.
I Corinthians 7:3-5
A.
“Let the
husband render unto his wife due benevolence and
likewise also the wife unto the husband.”
1.
Meet sexual
needs…please the mate
2.
Be sensitive to one
another
B.
“The wife hath not
power of her own body but the husband: and likewise also the
husband hath not power over his own body, but the wife.”
1.
Mates do not have
the right to do as one pleases for oneself but for one another.
2.
Power: claim or
authority
C.
“Defraud ye not
one the other.”
1.
Not deprive one another of sexual needs
D.
“Except it
be with consent for a time, that ye may give yourselves to fastings
and prayer; and come together again, that Satan tempt
you not for your incontinency.”
1.
Temporary and with
mutual agreement
2.
Share and talk about
sexual needs
3.
Communicate: 1.)Factual-“weather” 2.)You
“accusation” 3.)I feel, 4.)Solution
VI.
I Corinthians
7:33-34 “He
that is married careth for the things that are of the world, how he may
please his wife. She
that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please
her husband.”
A.
Earthly needs,
things
B.
Encourage one
another to be all God wants them to be
C.
Give your
expectations of your mate to the Lord
D.
Genesis 3:16
1.
“Thy desire
shall be to thy husband and he shall rule over thee.”
a.
Woman to desire her
husband
b.
Woman is the
receiver and responder
c.
Man is the initiator
d.
Place over for
protection like an umbrella not lord over!
e.
To go before, lead,
guide, by example and persuasion
VII.
I Timothy
3:4-5,12 “Bishop
must be one that ruleth well his own house. For if a man know not how to
rule his own house, how shall he take care of the church of God?
Let the deacons rule their children and their own
house well.”
VIII.
I Timothy 5:17
“Let the elders that rule well…”
IX.
Ephesians
5:21,23,25,28,33
A.
“Submit
yourselves one to another in the fear of God.”
1.
First,
submit yourselves to the Lordship of Jesus Christ
2.
Secondly,
mutually submit yourselves to one another
3.
Thirdly,
wives submit to husbands
B.
“Wives, submit
yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord.”
1.
To set in array
under
2.
Trust God to work
through your husband
3.
Yielding to, easily
entreated, open to reason and appeal and willing to change when one is
wrong
C.
“For the husband
is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the
church:”
1.
In direction, love
and care as the head of the body
D.
“Husbands, love
your wives even as Christ also loved the church, and gave
himself for it;”
1.
Agape, God kind of
love demonstrated
E.
“So ought men to love their wives as their own bodies.
He that loveth his wife loveth himself.”
1.
Agape, God kind of
love demonstrated
F.
“Nevertheless let
every one of you in particular so love his wife even as himself;
and the wife see that she reverence her husband.”
1.
Agape, God kind of
love demonstrated
2.
Respect, honor and
praise
X.
Proverbs 31:28 “Her husband also, he praiseth her.”
A.
Godly praise and
compliments but not flattery
XI.
Colossians
3:18-19
A.
“Wives submit
yourselves unto your own husbands, as it is fit in the Lord.”
1.
Befits those who
love the Lord
2.
As the Lord requires
B.
“Husbands love
your wives and be not bitter against them.”
1.
Be affectionate both
verbal and physical with no strings attached
2.
Not resentful, not
treating harshly or roughly
XII.
I Peter 3:1-7
A.
“Likewise, ye
wives, be in subjection to your own husbands;”
1.
Submit, fit into
God’s plans for him as his helper
B.
“That if any
obey not the word, they also may without the word be won
by the conversation of the wives;”
1.
Disbelieve the word,
reject the message
2.
Apart from the word
3.
“conversation”
means daily life, consistent behavior
C.
“While they
behold your chaste conversation coupled with fear.”
1.
Behold: See through
your actions
2.
Pure, respectful and
god-fearing
D.
“Whose adorning
let it not be outward adorning but let it be the hidden man of the heart,
even the ornament of a meek
and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great
price.”
1.
Appearance not
outward…plaiting the hair, wearing of gold, or putting on of apparel;
2.
Inner life, beauty
within
3.
Gentle, modest,
quiet attitude
4.
Precious in God’s
sight
E.
“For after this
manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted
in God, being in subjection unto their own husbands:
adorned themselves even as Sarah obeyed Abraham…”(Genesis
20:1-18)
1.
Sarah trusted God as
she obeyed Abraham
F.
“Likewise, ye
husbands, dwell with your wives according to knowledge.”
1.
Know your wives:
Body, Mind and Spirit
2.
Thoughtful,
understanding, considerate
3.
Express
verbally…1.)I love you, 2.)I enjoyed it, 3.)You look nice, 4.)House is
clean, 5.)Give gifts/flowers, 6.)Give yourselves, 7.)Continue to
date/court 8.)Little things mean a lot
4.
I Corinthians
14:34-35 “Answer your
wives questions…teach your wives.”
G.
“Giving honor
unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel.”
1.
Value and worth
2.
Less strength not
less value
H.
“Being heirs
together of the grace of life.”
1.
Galatians 3:28
“There is neither male nor female: for ye are all one in Christ
Jesus.”
I.
“That your prayers
be not hindered.”
1.
Greek:. to cut off
2.
Decision making:
1.)Share first thoughts or impressions of possible future decisions
2.)Search the Scripture 3.)Seek wife’s counsel 4.)Pray together
5.)Counsel with other mature believers/elders
XIII.Titus
2:4-5
A.
“Women to be
sober”
1.
Discreet, orderly,
sound mind, controlled, live quietly
B.
“To love their
husbands”
1.
Greek: philanthropia=friendship
2.
Should be best
friends
C.
“To love
their children”
1.
Greek: philoteknos=love
of children
D.
“To be discreet”
1.
Serious, sensible,
good judgment
E.
“Chaste”
1.
Pure-minded
F.
“Keepers at home”
1.
Workers at home, housekeepers, homemakers
G.
“Good”
1.
Kind and good
natured
H.
“Obedient to their own husbands”
1.
Submissive,
respectful
I.
“That the word of God be not blasphemed.”
J.
To speak injuriously
XIV.
Hebrews 13:4
“Marriage is honorable in all and the bed undefiled”
A.
Honorable: Respected, esteemed precious, of great value
B.
Undefiled: Pure, sacred
XV.
Revelation 19:7-9
“Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honor to Him: for the marriage of
the Lamb is come, and His wife hath made herself ready.
And to her was granted that she should be arrayed in fine linen,
clean and white: for the fine linen is the righteousness of saints.
And he saith unto me, Write, Blessed are they which are called unto
the marriage supper of the Lamb. And
he saith unto me, These are the true sayings of God.” Revelation 22:17 “And the Spirit and the bride say,
Come. And let him that
heareth say, Come. And let
him that is athirst come. And
whosoever will, let him take of the water of life freely.”
XVI.
OTHER SCRIPTURES
REFERENCES:
A.
Matthew 2:13-15 Joseph and Mary in Egypt
B.
Luke 1:26-38 Mary “Behold the handmaid of the Lord; be
it unto me according to thy word.”
C.
Genesis 20:1-18 Abraham and Sarah in Gerar
D.
Esther 4:14-16 Mordecai: “Who knoweth whether thou art
come to the kingdom for such a time as this?
Esther If I perish, I perish.”
E.
Proverbs 31:1-31 Woman whose husband sat at the gate of
the city
F.
Psalms 68:5: “A Father of the fatherless, and a
judge(discerner) of the widows, is God in His holy habitation.”
G.
Isaiah 54:5-6 “For thy Maker is thine husband; the Lord
of hosts is His Name; and thy Redeemer the Holy One of Israel; The God
of the whole earth shall He be called.
For the Lord hath called thee as a woman forsaken and grieved in
spirit, and a wife of youth, when thou wast refused, saith God.”
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